Operation Ireland spread the Good News
Yesterday was one of those days that I kept dreaming about my plans to travel to Ireland. You may remember a blog post I did back in June 2017 about feeling God was calling me to go to Ireland but not knowing why or when.
I’ve always had a burning desire to go. I love the music, the people and the wide open spaces. The big question has always been how and when?
Yesterday was a tough day. I didn’t get much of anything done. I felt I had no direction and the work on my second book had stalled. I really didn’t know where to take it next.
I felt like I’d hit a wall. I didn’t have an ending and wasn’t sure where it was going. Last night wasn’t any better. I tossed and turned and couldn’t find sleep. No matter what I did I was wide awake. I think I finally fell asleep around 3 am.
I prayed and kept asking God; what are you wanting me to understand? What am I missing? Nothing came.
This morning I did the only thing I knew to do. I got down on my knees and ask God to forgive me for my lack of faith in the future and the direction he wanted me to go.
I needed Him to release me from all fear and unbelief. I had to ask Him to put all my worries about what to do next away and please give me a clear direction.
I knew His plans for me all the way up to severing my buddy at Joni and Friends in August but that was it.
I knew this clearly because He provided me a scholarship for my trip when this year I couldn’t afford to go. Matter of fact… when they emailed me and ask me why I hadn’t filled out my paperwork and if there was a problem I shared my issues and concerns with them.
This is a mission that you pay your own way. With all the things in my home breaking in the last 2 months it just wasn’t possible for me this year.
Sherri (the coordinator of short term Missionaries) encouraged me not to give up. They really wanted me to come and needed me. I was a valued member of this team. They normally don’t reach out directly to ask people to come back who have served. (Trust me this was a God thing)
She ask me to trust God to provide and fundraise for it. She sent me over form letters with the logo explaining the mission and asking for support. She encouraged me to do this and not just walk away or give up, but trust God if this truly was my only reason for not doing it this year.
Whatever I raised would be great and they would fill in the balance with some scholarship money that had just been given to them. (they normally do not pay or help any STM’s with costs) This is a mission that needs commitment due to working with disabled folks.
I really didn’t want to fundraise for myself. This goes against everything I’ve ever done. I have no problem asking for money for charities I work for, but this was for my support to do the work set before me.
This was about my pride and humbling myself before God and my church to ask for assistance in my mission work. I have always been the one who gives to others.
Now for the first time in my life, I was having to ask for assistance, and from people who knew me! Aggrhh…
God knew there were several lessons for me here. Humility and faith being foremost. I needed faith to trust in His plan for my life and allow Him to do his work. He will always come through in my time of need. (Much easier said than done.) My job was and is.. “Trust God and do good.”
I chose to do what He was leading me to do through encouragement from others.
I humbled myself, filled out the letter and hand delivered it to one of the pastors at my church. I explained my situation and my need. I apologized for even having to ask. He was super sweet, supportive and understanding.
God blessed my obedience and they helped me with the entire scholarship price. Praise the Lord. This left Joni and Friends scholarship money for someone else in need. It also gave me a new appreciation and respect for my church along with faith in God to provide for my needs when I’m doing His will.
So now you’re thinking. “Did I read the title of this wrong?” Nope, step one was me trusting God with this request so that He could plant or I should say “reconfirm” His bigger plan in my heart.
You see.. I’ve been thinking of going back to work full time. These last 3 ½ years have truly been the best of my life.
I know God called me out of my job for a reason. He has done so much in my life since then. That’s what my second book is about. The faith to step out and see where God leads me.
But I was stuck and couldn’t finish my second book. Why? Because I was having doubts about His provision. You see, Money is running out.
He reminded me. Trust in me not in things you can see, but in the things you cannot see. This is what faith and a close walk is about.
Finally today down on my knees struggling like never before seeking His face and direction. He gave me a clear thought of what I am to do. Beyond this I do not know. That’s not for now.. Only what He’s given me to do for now.
He wants me to finish my second book and take it along with my first book to Ireland and leave them. He wants me to place tracts (Do you believe ones) inside every book as a book marker.
You see Ireland has moved far away from God. Most people may not be open to hearing about Him either. It’s not my job to force feed people. My job is simple.
Be an example, shine the light in darkness and plant the seeds of scripture.
I fill my books with scripture. People will pick up and read a book (especially if it’s free) but they are much less likely to pick up a bible and read. Their bookmark will be the Roman road which explains salvation in great detail.
I am called to plant seeds and trust God to do His work. I can leave them with Library’s, the B& B’s anywhere He opens the doors. Many places have book sharing libraries. You leave a book, take a book. I can leave them.
If people ask what it’s about (they typically do.). I can explain it’s about my faith Walk with God. Stepping out of my comfort zone of corporate America and stepping into full time following, trusting, God.
(I’m only on chapter 3) and have some revisions in the begging I have to make. Thanks to help with a proof reader and his advice.
I was stuck because deep down in my heart I had fear of the future. I see my savings getting very low thanks to all the unexpected turns in life and I thought a lot about going back to work full time.
This is what the evil one would love for me to do. If he can stop us before we fulfill all that God has for us he wins.
But God has called me out for a reason. He has sustained me these last three and half years’ very well. I can’t believe how well.. Trust me .. It’s a God thing.
He knows my heart for missions and volunteer work. I’ve also been blessed to be able to work with my granddaughter and take her to bible study and teach her to read the bible for herself. She loves it. I’ve had to print and make summer bible studies for her because our BSF (Bible study fellowship) is out of session until the fall. Praise God for her hungry heart to learn. What a blessing for the future.
I haven’t blogged lately because let’s face it.. I was doubting God had called me to write.
I want to inspire people. I want to lead them to the word of God It’s alive and so exciting to study. But let’s face it… when you only get one or two positive words back and see that only 5 or 6 people even read what you wrote that stings and puts doubts in your mind.
Then God told me very clearly. “Who are you doing this for? Me or you?”
If only one person is encouraged or finds hope in my writing then God can use them.
It’s not about numbers. It’s about spreading the word of God in a dark world. It’s about planning seeds. It’s about living out what you write and letting God do His job.
So now I clearly have my marching orders…
1. Finish my 2nd book.
2. Put tracts in each one of them and carry them to Ireland to plant seeds.
3. The work program I want to do is in late Aug-Sept. I know God will open the right door and put me where He wants me to be used.
4. Request prayer from anyone and everyone in helping me see this through to completion.
James 1:4- Let endurance have tis perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
Joshua 1:9- Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.
Matthew 28:19-20- Go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and the Holy Spirit, teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.
Amen and Praise God for clear desire and direction.
Blessings to you and your families.
Brenda